E10/EF7 "" examples from you

1. All the animals met and talked “[a]s soon as the light…went out”. (1) 2. The life of the animals on animal farm was “miserable, laborious and short.” (3) 3.Like Old Major said the animal’s lives on Animal Farm are hard, “laborious and short.”(3) In order to get a better life, they decide to “get rid of Man.”(5) 4.The animals on the farm are unhappy. Their lives are “miserable,laborious and short ”(3). 5. In the farm, an animal’s life is “misery and slavery”.(3) The animals are not free and usually live harsh spare lives. 6.Before rebelling, the animals’ lives in the farm are “miserable” (3) and “laborious”, and they are forced to work until they are dead. 7. In past years, life on Animal farm was quite comfortable when Mr. Jones had been “a capable farmer”. (11) 8. Under the control of the human, the life of the animals is “miserable,laborious,and short.”(3) 9. Old Major said that the lives for animals in the farm “are miserable, laborious and short” (3) and he accused Man of that.

E10/ EF7 Christopher Hitchens quotation

For scene when animals are in field after rebellion (pp13-14) “Choked-up feelings of emotion at liberation are the surest sign that a moment of disillusion and disappointment is at hand.” Christopher Hitchens. A Long Short War: The Postponed Liberation of Iraq , Penguin: Toronto, 2003

E10/ EF7 "" examples from you

1. Mr. Jones, who managed the Manor Farm, was regarded as “the lord of all the animals” (1). 2. The end of their lives is like a sacrifice for their human “lord”(4) because humans are using their dead bodies. 3. The animals’ lives on Animal Farm were “miserable, laborious and short”.(3) 4. All animals lives are “miserable, laborious and short”(3) on the farm, so they want to survive until one day Old Major tells them of revolution, and teaches them a song called “ Beasts of England”. 5.All animals work hard, but they are “starving”.(4) 6. All the animals in the farm felt like they were living in “misery and slavery”(2) while Mr. Jones was lying around and drunk all day.

E10/ EF7 "" work

Boxer was a horse who had “steadiness of character”. (2) Boxer, “an enormous beast” (2), was a friend of Benjamin’s. SHORT, INCORPORATED Incorporated means the quotation has been made part of your sentence. If the “” were gone, it would still be a grammatical sentence. Boxer was a work horse who was “nearly eighteen hands high”. (2) Boxer was a really big horse: “nearly eighteen hands high”. (3) NO GOOD, NOT INCORPORATED Boxer was a big horse. He was an “enormous beast”. (3) Boxer was a big horse who had a “somewhat stupid appearance”. (3) Boxer was a huge horse who worked hard, and he was an “enormous beast”. (2) Boxer, who was an “enormous beast” (2), was a dumb horse who worked hard. Boxer, who was “an enormous beast” (2), was “nearly eighteen hands high”. TOO MUCH QUOTATION Boxer, who was “an enormous beast” (2), was unusually tall. WHERE TO PUT THE PERIOD? Boxer was a horse who had “steadiness of character”. (2) Boxer was a horse who had “tremendous powers of work.” (2) DETAIL, IMPORTANT BUT NOT CRITICAL Boxer was a horse who had “tremendous powers of work” (2) and who was huge. … … ellipsis …… NOT ENGLISH , etc I like dogs, cats, fish, goats, ……. NOT ENGLISH I like dogs, cats, fish, goats, etc. ENGLISH et cetera, and others, ‘and so on’ … shows that words have been removed Benjamin and Boxer were great friends and loved to hang out on “Sundays together… never speaking.” (2) MUST BE GRAMMATICAL Benjamin and Boxer were great friends and loved to hang out on “Sundays… speaking.” (2) NOT GRAMMATICAL Benjamin, who was a donkey, was the “oldest… and the worst tempered” (2) of all the animals. GRAMMATICAL Benjamin, who was a donkey, was the “oldest… tempered” (2) of all the animals. NOT GRAMMATICAL … POWERFUL TOOL, USE IT WISELY, USE IT SPARINGLY [ ] square brackets- USED TO CHANGE WORDS, ONLY FOR GRAMMAR OR CLARITY Stephen Harper said, “[Obama]is a very nice man.” Benjamin and Boxer liked “spent their Sundays together”. (2) NOT GRAMMATICAL Benjamin and Boxer liked “spen[ding] their Sundays together”. (2) [] POWERFUL TOOL, USE IT WISELY, USE IT SPARINGLY Boxer and Benjamin “usually [liked] spen[ding] their Sundays together… never speaking.” (2) UGLY, NOT ELEGANT, AWKWARD, BETTER TO REWRITE IN A DIFFERENT WAY Boxer and Benjamin “spent their Sundays” (2) standing silently eating grass together. Boxer and Benjamin liked to spend time in silence “grazing side by side”. (2)

E10 EF7 "" work

Boxer was a horse who had “steadiness of character”. (2) Boxer, “an enormous beast” (2), was a friend of Benjamin’s. SHORT, INCORPORATED Boxer was a work horse who was “nearly eighteen hands high”. (2) Boxer was a huge horse who worked hard, and he was an “enormous beast”. (2) Boxer, who was an “enormous beast” (2), was a dumb horse who worked hard. Boxer, who was “an enormous beast” (2), was “nearly eighteen hands high”. TOO MUCH QUOTATION Boxer, who was “an enormous beast” (2), was unusually tall. WHERE TO PUT THE PERIOD? Boxer was a horse who had “steadiness of character”. (2) Boxer was a horse who had “tremendous powers of work.” (2) DETAIL, IMPORTANT BUT NOT CRITICAL … ellipsis …… NOT ENGLISH , etc I like dogs, cats, fish, goats, ……. NOT ENGLISH I like dogs, cats, fish, goats, etc. ENGLISH et cetera, and others … shows that words have been removed Benjamin and Boxer were great friends and loved to hang out on “Sundays together… never speaking.” (2) MUST BE GRAMMATICAL Benjamin and Boxer were great friends and loved to hang out on “Sundays… speaking.” (2) NOT GRAMMATICAL Benjamin, who was a donkey, was the “oldest… and the worst tempered” (2) of all the animals. GRAMMATICAL Benjamin, who was a donkey, was the “oldest… tempered” (2) of all the animals. NOT GRAMMATICAL … POWERFUL TOOL, USE IT WISELY, USE IT SPARINGLY [ ] square brackets- USED TO CHANGE WORDS, ONLY FOR GRAMMAR OR CLARITY Stephen Harper said, “[Obama] is a very nice man.” Benjamin and Boxer liked “spent their Sundays together”. (2) NOT GRAMMATICAL Benjamin and Boxer liked “spen[ding] their Sundays together”. (2) [] POWERFUL TOOL, USE IT WISELY, USE IT SPARINGLY Boxer and Benjamin “usually [liked] spen[ding] their Sundays together… never speaking.” (2) UGLY, NOT ELEGANT, AWKWARD, BETTER TO REWRITE IN A DIFFERENT WAY

English 10/ EF7 "Little Women for Little Women in Afghanistan"

Little Women For Little Women in Afghanistan

           

Little Women for Little Women in Afghanistan was founded by Alaina Podmorow in the fall of 2006 after she attended a speech by Sally Armstrong, journalist and human rights activist, and author of Veiled Threat and Bitter Roots, Tender Shoots.  Alaina was deeply moved by Armstrong’s stories of the hardships of girls in Afghanistan and their struggle to exercise their right for education. She was inspired by Sally’s words, “The worst thing you can do is nothing.”

Alaina started a team of girls from her school called Little Women for Little Women in Afghanistan in the spring of 2007.  Eighteen girls from Davidson Road Elementary School in Lake Country joined the team which has focused their incredible energy and spearheaded many events and projects to support Afghan girls and women.

To date, Little Women has raised over $375,000.  100% of all donated funds are sent to Afghanistan through the mother organization, Canadian Women for Women in Afghanistan to pay the salaries of Afghan teachers, train teachers, support education initiatives, libraries and community projects.  The “Littles” participate annually in the International Women’s Day celebrations across the country and march proudly for children’s rights on Children’s Rights Day June 1st.

Through raising funds and awareness, Little Women for Little Women support education projects in Afghanistan, so that girls and women in Afghanistan will have their human rights restored, live freely and in peace.  The projects are created and managed by Afghan women or communities.

Adapted from http://www.littlewomenforlittlewomen.com/

In Alaina’s words:

I founded Little Women when I was nine years old when I learned about the terrible human rights violations that happen to little girls in Afghanistan. It was so upsetting that girls could not attend school or get educated or receive the basic rights of equality and education. Little Women have been working hard to make change for girls in Afghanistan. I believe education=peace and only through education can peace be achieved.

Little women have many projects to support our education projects on the ground in Afghanistan. Through fundraising and raising awareness, we have recently trained 1200 teachers, we have paid teachers’ salaries, funded libraries, bought books, supported an orphanage, helped build a school and listened to what the Afghan girls and Women want and need. Just as important, we are spreading awareness about the need for others to take action. There are thousands of girls going to school because of the projects running on the ground and there are 1000's who we speak to here in Canada the US and the world who get enlightened and then take action.

Adapted from http://www.dosomething.org/project/little-women-little-women-afghanistan

E10/EF7 Background on "The Testimony of Patience Kershaw"

The song is based upon the testimony given by a young woman, Patience Kershaw, to an investigation by Lord Ashley’s Mines Commission of 1842, which looked into the conditions of labour in the mines. The Mines Act of 1842 that resulted prohibited the employment in the mines of all women and of boys under thirteen.

No. 26. — Patience Kershaw, aged 17, May 15, 1842.

“My father has been dead about a year; my mother is living and has ten children, five lads and five lasses; the oldest is about thirty, the youngest is four; three lasses go to mill; all the lads are colliers, two getters and three hurriers; one lives at home and does nothing; mother does nought but look after home.

“All my sisters have been hurriers, but three went to the mill. Alice went because her legs swelled from hurrying in cold water when she was hot. I never went to day-school; I go to Sunday-school, but I cannot read or write; I go to pit at five o’clock in the morning and come out at five in the evening; I get my breakfast of porridge and milk first; I take my dinner with me, a cake, and eat it as I go; I do not stop or rest any time for the purpose; I get nothing else until I get home, and then have potatoes and meat, not every day meat. I hurry in the clothes I have now got on, trousers and ragged jacket; the bald place upon my head is made by thrusting the corves; my legs have never swelled, but sisters’ did when they went to mill; I hurry the corves a mile and more under ground and back; they weigh 300 cwt.; I hurry 11 a-day; I wear a belt and chain at the workings, to get the corves out; the getters that I work for are naked except their caps; they pull off all their clothes; I see them at work when I go up; sometimes they beat me, if I am not quick enough, with their hands; they strike me upon my back; the boys take liberties with me; sometimes they pull me about; I am the only girl in the pit; there are about 20 boys and 15 men; all the men are naked; I would rather work in mill than in coal-pit.”

The commission concluded: “This girl is an ignorant, filthy, ragged, and deplorable-looking object, and such an one as the uncivilized natives of the prairies would be shocked to look upon.”

Read more testimonials from girl miners at http://library.thinkquest.org/05aug/01419/minesact.html