E10/EF7 example paragraph

WRITING PROMPT:

Why didn’t the boys harvest the pheasants?

specific

intent of the question?

CONTROLLING IDEA why not kill the birds

1.    innocent, naïve

2.    incomplement weather

3.    no tools

4.    felt empathy, felt sorry

COHERENCE- TIME, SPACE, IMPORTANCE

TOPIC SENTENCE- topic, controlling

PLOT, RETOLD THE STORY

WHY?

vt, vf, punc, CS, sp

          Why didn’t the boys harvest the pheasants?

          1.-felt empathy for them/ same situation

          frozen, cold, outside- breath, moving heads

2. -children- want to protect all living things, pure, good hearts, not adult farmers

want to save pheasants

3.- first boy took ACTION, everybody else followed

         

          The boys didn’t kill the pheasants even though they set out to do so because when they were faced with the reality of the helpless birds, they couldn’t go through with it. First of all, the boys aye have felt unconciously that the birds and they were in a similar situation, in the cold on the stormy day. Consequently, they felt protective of the birds and wanted to save them from the cold.  Most importantly, when one of the boys chose to take the action of putting his coats over two birds, the other boys followed his lead.  The decision about what to do had been made for them. In the end, the boys changed their minds about harvesting the birds.