1. KERNEL We were preparing.
We were preparing for the second performance of our play, and the dressing room was in a state.
in a state = messy
We were preparing for the second performance of our play, so the dressing room was in a state.
We were preparing for the second performance of our play in the dressing room which was in a state.
The dressing room was in a state while we were preparing for the second performance of our play.
while - reason, time
2. Racks for costumes were scattered
CONCISE, CONDENSED
Costume racks and trays for makeup were scattered... NOT PARALLEL -same structure, model, same word order
Costume racks and makeup trays
Racks for costumes and trays for makeup
Racks that are for costumes and trays that are for makeup
PARALLELISM
SHORT/CONCISE
KISS Principle: "Keep it simple, silly."
Costume racks and makeup trays were scattered around/about the room.
3. Helpers were dressing cast members and applying their makeup, so nearly everyone was nervous.
Helpers were dressing cast members and applying their makeup; nearly everyone was nervous.
Nearly everyone was nervous while helpers were dressing cast members and applying their makeup.
4. The female lead could not get her wig to stay on properly; on the other hand, the male lead was having a tug-of-war with a pair of suspenders that would not not cooperate.
The female lead could not get her wig to stay on properly; on the other hand, the male lead was having a tug-of-war with a pair of uncooperative suspenders. TIGHTER, CONCISE
SIMPLE
COMPOUND
COMPLEX-adjective cl, adverb cl, noun cl
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