EF6 Saturday Night with the Kids sentence combining possible solutions

SENTENCE COMBINING

SIMPLE, COMPOUND, COMPLEX- FOCUS OF EF6

CONSISTENT GOOD SENTENCES

Saturday Night with the Kids

1. Samuel babysits on Saturday night. KERNEL

Samuel babysits Jeffrey and Catelina on Saturday night.

Samuel babysits Jeffrey who is two and Catelina who is four on Saturday night.

Samuel babysits Jeffrey, who is a two-year-old, and Catelina, who is a four-year-old, on Saturday night.

Samuel babysits Jeffrey, who is two years old, and Catelina, who is four years old, on Saturday night for several hours.

For several hours on Saturday night,

2. They love him because he pillow fights and lets them be noisy, watch TV and stay up late.

They love him because he pillow fights and lets them be noisy, watch TV and stay up late.

They love him because he pillow fights; also, he lets them be noisy, watch TV and stay up late.

3. Sometimes Erich, who is Samuel’s friend, comes over and cooks fudge with the children.

Sometimes Erich’s friend, Samuel, comes over to cook fudge with the children.

4. They laugh and make a mess.

They laugh while they make a mess.

5. Bathtime is fun because it usually involves a hilarious water fight that requires a clean-up.

Bathtime is fun because it usually involves a water fight that is hilarious but requires a clean-up.

6. The parents return at midnight and find the children in bed and the house clean; also, Samuel is sleeping on the couch.

The house is clean and the children are in bed when the parents return home at midnight; Samuel is sleeping on the couch.

EF7/ E10 Air Show sentence combining possible solutions

SENTENCES- SIMPLE, COMPOUND, COMPLEX

comprehension-

Air Show

1. The air show attracts locals. KERNEL

The air show attracts thousands of locals and tourists, so the show grows bigger every year. COMPOUND

The air show, which grows bigger every year, attracts thousands of locals and tourists. COMPLEX

2. Screaming jets fly low overhead in teams as pilots display their skills.

Pilots display their skills by flying their screaming jets in teams low and overhead.

Teams of pilots display their skills by flying their screaming jets low and overhead.

3. Cringing adults watch in awe while some crying children cover their ears; nevethless, they want to see more. COMPOUND COMPLEX

Cringing adults who are watching in awe and some crying children who are covering their ears want to see more.

Cringing adults watching in awe and some crying children covering their ears want to see more.

On one hand, cringing adults watch in awe while some crying children cover their ears; on the other hand, they want to see more.

4. Skydivers float gently down to earth from 1000 metres up; they guide their falls and land on a white cross.

Skydivers who float gently down to earth from 1000 metres up guide their falls to land on a white cross.

5. Biplanes which are imitations of early aircraft engage in fights that are typical of WW1.

Biplanes, imitations of early aircraft, engage in fights typical of WW1.

EF7/ E10 sentence combining work

SENTENCE STYLES- consistent sentence writing

SIMPLE, COMPOUND, COMPLEX- beginning, first steps, building blocks,

How Not to Study

1. David yawns. KERNEL

David yawns and glances at his watch.

David yawns and, glances at his watch and easily represses a thought.

easy (adj) easily (adv) wf- word form

David yawns, glances at his watch and easily represses a thought about homework which is due tomorrow. COMPLEX SENT- ADJ CL

David yawns, glancing at his watch and easily repressing a thought about homework which is due tomorrow.

David yawns and glances at his watch, easily repressing a thought about homework which is due tomorrow.

2. Television’s eye has held him captive. KERNEL

Television’s flickering, hypnotic eye which is flickering has held him captive.

ORDER OF ADJECTIVES

Opinion	Size	Age	Shape	Colour	Origin	Material	Purpose

beautiful old table old beautiful table

small round Japanese tea cup round small tea Japanese cup

cute, beautiful baby        beautiful, cute baby

Television’s flickering, hypnotic eye has held him captive all evening; now, the news is about to be broadcast. COMPOUND

EF6 Ch13 Q6 with ""

PARAGRAPH WRITING

STRUCTURE-Topic sentence- topic controlling idea

connected to question- mirror vocabulary in the question,

like LEGO blocks

3-4 supporting sentences- supporting the TS

          coherence – TIME, SPACE, IMPORTANCE

FOR ACADEMIC WRITING, PERSUASIVE WRITING IS THE MAIN TYPE OF WRITING

ARGUMENT, OPINION, CONVINCE

unity-         EVERYTHING HAS TO BE ON-TOPIC, SUPPORTING THE TS, CUT!

                             “” QUOTED MATERIAL

concluding sentence- RESTATE THE TS

WRITING PROCESS

1. Analyze the topic

2. Generate ideas-        MIND MAP, LISTS, FREEWRITE, THINKING, WRITE IT DOWN

3. Organize-                  TIME, SPACE, IMPORTANCE

4. Rough copy-             PASS IN AN EDITTED ROUGH COPY

5. Edit, proofread-        vt, vf, sp, punc, wf ----------------------/

6. Good copy/ Great copy

Ch13 Q6

What does The Giver say about change?

p103

5. “faced with something that they have not experiences before”

3. “use the memories and advise them”

4. “seldom happens”

1. “they don’t want change”

2. “Life here is so ordered, so predictable- so painless. It’s what they’ve chosen.”

          The Giver tells Jonas that the people in their community aren’t interested in changing any parts of their society. The Elders, for example, “don’t want change”(103) and would rather keep their lives “ordered...[and] predictable”.  The Giver says that he is “seldom” asked to give advice because the people have “chosen” to have no new unexpected situations in their lives. The Giver warns Jonas not to expect to be asked about how to alter any part of their community.  

EF6 How not to Study- sentence combining

SENTENCE COMBINING- SENTENCE TYPES

SIMPLE, COMPOUND, COMPLEX

VARIETY OF SENTENCES- AUTOMATIC

1. David yawns. KERNEL

David yawns and glances at his watch.

David yawns, glances at his watch and represses a thought.

David yawns, glances at his watch and easily represses a thought.

easy(adj) easily(adv) WF word form

David yawns, glances at his watch and easily represses a thought about homework that is due tomorrow. COMPLEX- ADJ CL

David yawns and glances at his watch; then he easily represses a thought about homework that is due tomorrow.COMPOUND COMPLEX

After David yawns and glances at his watch, he easily represses a thought about homework that is due tomorrow. COMPLEX- ADV CL ADJ CL

After it rains, but we go out.

SOBA is for COMPOUND

2. Television's flickering, hypnotic eye has held him captive.

Television's hypnotic, flickering eye has held him captive all evening, but now the news is about to be broadcast. COMPOUND

The big blue house is nice. The blue big house is nice.

The laughing, smiling baby is cute.

The cute six-month-old baby is crying.

ORDER OF ADJECTIVES

Opinion Size Age Shape Colour Origin Material Purpose NOUN

the big green garbage can

a round Japanese tea cup

a beautiful Japanese tea cup a tea beautiful Japanese cup

a beautiful, exquisite Japanese tea cup

a tiny, little kitten

3. Finally he can procrastinate no longer, so he heads for his room where his books are strewn across his cluttered and poorly-lit desk. COMPOUND COMPLEX

4. He desperately tries to remember his assignment which he neglected to write down; he then pushes the books to one side.

It is chilly; therefore, she is wearing a sweater.

It is chilly; she is, therefore, wearing a sweater.

It is chilly; she is wearing a sweater, therefore.

SENTENCE STYLE WORK IN CLASS IS JUST THE FIRST LEVEL

5. The radio clicks on and pumps out country-western music. SIMPLE

The radio which has clicked on is pumping out country-western music. COMPLEX

SIMPLE COMPOUND COMPLEX- FOUNDATION OF SENTENCE WRITING

11. A half hour passes with no one at the desk; he finally returns and decides to study in bed because he can study better there.

After a half hour passes with no one at the desk, he finally returns and decides to study in bed because he can study better there.

7. Words swim before his tired eyes.

The words look blurry in front of his tired eyes.

6. He opens a textbook and flips though its pages while his lips mouth the tune and his foot keeps time with the insistent rhythm. 

He opens a textbook and flips though its pages; his lips mouth the tune while his foot keeps time with the insistent rhythm. 

He opens a textbook and flips though its pages; his lips mouth the tune; meanwhile, his foot keeps time with the insistent rhythm.

9. A vague hunger/worry has begun to gnaw at him.

8. He reads aimlessly for a few minutes, but he is not thinking about the ideas. COMPOUND

He reads aimlessly for a few minutes, not thinking about the ideas.

He reads aimlessly for a few minutes without thinking about the ideas.

EF6 Clauses, punctuation,etc

Lesson 1

1. The Mississippi River the largest river in North America. FRAGMENT

The Mississippi River is the largest river in North America.

The Mississippi River, the largest river in North America, runs north to south.

The Mississippi River, which is the largest river in North America, flows through the South. NON-RESTRICTIVE ADJECTIVE CLAUSE

2. Reached a verdict after three hours. FRAGMENT

The judge/ The jury reached a verdict after three hours.

3. The reward for a hard day’s work.

Adam got the reward for a hard day’s work that he did.

The reward for a hard day’s work is a good rest.

The reward is for a hard day’s work.

4. Although several inches of snow fell during the night. ADVERB CLAUSE

Several inches of snow fell during the night.

Although several inches of snow fell during the night, we still went to school.

She still drove her car although several inches of snow fell during the night.

5. Your grandmother found the ten-mile race exhausting.

6. Many American carpet manufacturers are located in Georgia. OK

7. The term ‘canoe’ referring to several types of thin, long boats.

The term ‘canoe’ is referring/ refers to several types of thin, long boats.

kayak

8. Canada is the largest country in the Western Hemisphere.

Canada, which is the largest country in the Western Hemisphere, has ten provinces.

The largest country in the Western Hemisphere is Canada.

9. Early people were creating/ created art on the walls of caves.

 France, caves 20000 years ago- 

E10/EF7 Using Quotations

using quotations

Here are some key points to remember when using quotations:

1)   Incorporate quotations into your sentences.

Fit inside your sentence, part of- grammatical

Old Major was an old, “majestic-looking”(1) animal.

Old Major was an old animal- “majestic-looking”(1)

2)   Keep quotations to a few words.  Quotations are like salt in  food: a little bit gives flavour; too much ruins the dish.

Old Major was a “majestic-looking pig with a wise and

benevolent appearance”(1) TOO LONG

3)   Use quoted material to support your points.

4)   Don’t use too many quotations.  Pick two or three quotations to support your brainstormed points and leave the rest.

Old Major was “twelve years old”(1) and “rather stout”, so he was “majestic-looking” and also “wise and benevolent”.

5)   Make sure the quoted material is exactly as written in the story.  Use … and [] to make minor grammatical or stylistic changes.

… ellipsis, Omitted words

…… etc et cetera

I like cats, dogs, fish, etc.

I like cats, dogs, fish…… NOT ENGLISH, TRANSLATION

“majestic-looking pig, with a wise and benevolent appearance”

“majestic-looking … appearance” words have been omitted

STILL HAS TO BE GRAMMATICAL

Old Major had a “majestic-looking … appearance”(1). GRAMMATICAL

Old Major was “twelve years old [and] …rather stout” (1).NOT GRAMMATICAL

[] square brackets- added words or letters to make the sentence grammatical

“stout motherly”(2)

Clover was a “stout motherly”(2) horse.

Clover was “stout [and] motherly”(2).

… [] USE SPARINGLY

Clover was a “stout…mare [in] … middle age”(2). POOR CHOICE, AWKWARD

          Clover was a “stout, motherly” (2) horse who was not young.

          CLEANER STYLE

6)   Avoid repeating quotations.

ONE TIME ONLY, LIKE DENTAL FLOSS

7)   After quoting material, go on to explain why the quotation is relevant.

8)   Avoid ending paragraphs with quotations.

END WITH YOUR OWN WORDS

EF6 Using Quotations

using quotations

Here are some key points to remember when using quotations:

1)   Incorporate quotations into your sentences.

quotation has to be grammatical, inside your sentence

Lily felt “impatience”(5) for the visiting children.

She wasn’t sure if they acted badly because they were “uneducated or clumsy”(5).

2)   Keep quotations to a few words.  Quotations are like salt in food: a little bit gives flavour; too much ruins the dish.

Lily “held up a clenched fist and the reast of the family smiled at her”(5). TOO LONG

3)   Use quoted material to support your points.

4)   Don’t use too many quotations.  Pick two or three quotations to support your brainstormed points and leave the rest.

Lily was “defiant” (5) and felt “impatience” at the “visitors”

who “didn’t obey the rules”. TOO MUCH. LESS IS MORE.

5)   Make sure the quoted material is exactly as written in the story.  Use … and [] to make minor grammatical or stylistic changes.

Lily was “impatien[t]”(5) with the kids.

[] square brackets

Lily was angry at the kids for not “obey[ing] the rules”(5).

UGLY, AWKWARD-LOOKING

Lily was angry at the kids because they did not “obey the rules”(5).

… ellipsis

…… etc et cetera “I like dogs, cats, fish, birds, etc.”

“I like dogs, cats, fish, birds……” NOT ENGLISH, TRANSLATION

… ellipsis, SHOWS WORDS HAVE BEEN OMITTED

“uneducated or clumsy, someone who didn’t fit in”(5)

“uneducated or … didn’t fit in” (5)

Lily felt they were “uneducated or … didn’t fit in”(5) with her society.

Lily felt they were “uneducated [and]… didn’t fit in”(5) with her society.

           

6)   Avoid repeating quotations.

ONE TIME ONLY USE, DENTAL FLOSS

7)   After quoting material, go on to explain why the quotation is relevant.

8)   Avoid ending paragraphs with quotations.

END WITH YOU OWN WORDS

E10/ EF7 Incorporating quoted material into your writing

INCORPORATE, MIX

IN POST-SECONDARY, MULTIPLE TEXTS

Animal Farm, Ch1, Q1

What is your first impression of Mr. Jones of Manor Farm?

PROCESS

1.Analyze

2.Generate ideas, 3-4 points

  “”

3.Organize

1.drunk

“too drunk to remember” (1)

2.cruel

“drowns” (5)

dogs

3.violent

shot his gun

“seized the gun” (8)

4.Rough copy

            A reader’s first impression of Mr. Jones would be that he is not a nice man.  First, he obviously has a drinking problem; in fact, at times he is “too drunk to remember” (1) to take care of his animals.  Also, Old Major tells us that is a cruel man with the animals; for example, he takes dogs that have outlived their usefulness and “drowns them” (5) without thinking about their lives.  Finally, he is a violent man. Whe he hears a commotion in the barn, he shoots his gun out of the window. In conclusion…   

BORROW, CITING

INCORPORATING- GRAMMATICAL

First, he obviously has a drinking problem: “too drunk to remember” (1)

NO GOOD, NOT A SENTENCE, NOT GRAMMATICAL

“He seized the gun which always stood in a corner of his bedroom” (8)

COPYING

Mr Jones “seized the gun” (8) and shot it out the bedroom window. INCORPORATED

Old Major said that the animals’ lives were “miserable, laborious and short.” (3)

Old Major told the other animals that they could improve their “miserable, laborious and short ” (3) lives.

EF6 quoting material

The Giver Ch4, Q2

Why doesn’t Jonas discuss Benjamin’s accomplishments?

PROCESS

1. Analyze

2. Generate ideas

3. Organize

4. Rough copy

5. Edit

6. Good copy

p.27

TS in their society not polite

1. Jonas “impressed”

2. “awkward”, can’t praise each other

“never any comfortable way”

3. “bragging” showing off

4. calling attention to successes

CS

INCORPORATE

Why doesn’t Jonas discuss Benjamin’s accomplishments?

            Jonas does not feel comfortable discussing Benjamin’s accomplishments because in their society, it is not polite to do so. Although Jonas is “impressed” (27) with his friend’s successes, both of them would find it “awkward” if Jonas were to praise him for them. In fact, calling attention to one’s own talents or those of a friend would seem like “bragging” in their culture, so they don’t do it. Instead, they admire each other’s work without comment.

INCORPORATE- mixing in, grammatical

Jonas admires his friend’s successes: “impressed” (27) No incorporation, not grammatical, not a sentence

Jonas doesn’t praise his friend, “rule against bragging” (27)

Jonas respects their societal “rule against bragging” (27), so he doesn’t praise Benjamin. INCORPORATED, GRAMMATICAL

QUOTE JUST A FEW WORDS, NOT A EXCUSE TO COPY OUT OF THE BOOK

They had never talked about the boy’s accomplishments because such a conversation would have been awkward for Benjamin. COPIED, MINDLESS

INCORPORATE

QUOTATIONS IN ANSWERS-

Ch5, Q1

What was Jonas’ dream?

“a little angry at her” (35)

“slightly embarrassed”

“convince her” (36)

            Jonas was “slightly embarrassed” (35) about his dream.  He had a dream about Fiona in which he tried to “convince her“ (36) to take a bath with him. Jonas told his parents that he “could feel the wanting”. This was his first “stirrings” (37) that he felt, and they felt “confusing” to him.

 It was about Jonas having a shower with Fiona, and he “wanted her to take off her clothes” (36) because he started to have feelings about her. INCORPORATED

EF6 Backstage sentence combining

1. We were preparing for the second performaance of our play, so the dressing room was in a state. COMPOUND
We were preparing for our performance which was the second of our play, and the dressing room was in a state. COMPOUND
The dressing room was in a state because we were preparing for the second performance of our play. COMPLEX
2. Racks which were for costumes were scattered
Costume racks were scattered, and makeup rays were scattered about the room. SIMPLE
Racks and trays were scattered about the room which were for costumes and make up. MISPLACED MODIFIER
Racks and trays which were for costumes and make up were scattered about the room. COMPLEX
3. Helpers were dressing cast member and applying their make up, so everyone was nervous. COMPOUND
Everyone was nervous because/ as/ while/ when helpers were dressing cast member and applying their make up. COMPLEX
Everyone was nervous, for helpers were dressing cast member and applying their make up. COMPOUND

EF6 example of conflict paragraph- quick paragraph

PROCESS

Plan

1. Analyze the topic

2. Generate ideas

3. Outline/ Organize

Write

4. Rough copy- topic sentence- topic + controlling idea

                             3-4 points

                             Concluding sentence

5. Edit- vocab, punc, vt, vf, sp, phrasing

6. Good copy

What is one conflict in “Trial in the Bank Saloon”?

person vs person, Brian Bonner and Hannah Young

1. BB pretends to be a great policeman, HY knows that he isn’t

Ex.BB said checking the bar “fire hazards”, HY checking every night

2. BB loved HY, HY doesn’t respect him

          beautiful and strong, lazy and a drunk

3. BB police powerful, HY influence, control

          great reputation, HY Great reputation

          One key/ critical/ underappreciated/ subtle conflict in “Trial in the Bank Saloon” is the person vs person conflict between the narrator, Brian Bonner, and the major character, Hannah Young. Initially, Constable Bonner pretends to be a responsible policeman.  For example, he claims to have been checking The Bank Saloon, which is the bar where the murder occured, for fire hazards.  However, Hannah Young knows that he isn’t. In fact, she makes a comment about him checking the bar every night, meaning that she thinks that he is a drunk. Also, throughout the story, it is obvious that Bonner loves Hannah and wants to be closer to her.  He talks about how beautiful and strong she is and how she makes him feel uneasy. Nevertheless, Hannah clearly does not respect him and wants nothing to do with him. Finally, Bonner likes to believe that he has great authority in the town because he is policeman.  He says that he has a great reputation in the area. To tell the truth, it is Hannah who has the respect of the townspeople, including Inspector Constantine, the head policeman.  She is able to influence people much more than Brian ever can.  To conclude, the person vs person conflict between Bonner and Young is not resolved in the story.

E10/EF7 "...and Restoring" sentence combining

... and Restoring

1.The girls set to work on their surprise gift in their friend’s basement. The girls set to work in their friend’s basement, so their gift could be a surprise.

2. They spread plastic over the area, gathered their supplies, and assembled their equipment; consequently/ next/ after that/ afterwards, they began by taking off the upholstered seats.

3. First, they applied a gel stripper that removed most of the old paint.

4. Next, they used a thin stripper and worked on the detail on the backrests.

EVERY SENTENCE THIS QUALITY

EF7/ E10 sentence types

1. The cat is chasing the mouse.

The mouse is being chased by the cat and is running away. PASSIVE VOICE

ACTIVE VOICE “I ate the sandwich.”

PASSIVE VOICE “The sandwich was eaten by me.

PASSIVE IS WEAK- AVOID IT UNLESS YOU WANT TO SOUND LIKE YOU ARE NOT RESPONSIBLE

“I made a mistake.”

“Mistakes were made.”

4. The mouse is running away because the cat is chasing it.

5. Since the cat is chasing the mouse, it is running away.

6. The cat is chasing a mouse which is running away.

    S adj cl V

The mouse, that/which is running away, is being chased by the cat.

7. The mouse (that/which the cat is chasing) is running away.

EF6 sentence types

SIMPLE

1. Her reason didn’t make sense.

2. I like cooking for my family.

3. My mother goes to the market everyday.

COMPOUND

4. She has to present her project in class, so she is nervous.

5. He had a basket of apples, but he dropped them.

6. Maria always cooks great food; in fact, she is the best cook in the family.

COMPLEX

7. I love the snow that falls in the winter. adj cl

8. She hurt her knee when she was playing volleyball. adv cl

9. I think that he uses big words to fool people. n cl

10. I think that the ink that she bought yesterday when she was in Chinatown is very special. n cl, adj cl, adv cl.