The narrator is protecting his broken heart: “built walls”. NOT INCORPORATED
He has “no need of friendship” and would prefer to be by himself.
He wishes that he had “never loved” anyone.
He wants to have “laughter” in his life. MISLEADING
“This movie... is the best... movie ever.”
This movie stinks. Brad Pitt thinks that he is the best, but actually this is the worst movie ever.”
... ellipsis
[] square brackets
He is so sad that even the street looks to him like it is covered in a “shroud of snow.”
INCORPORATING QUOTED MATERIAL
He has “disdain” for personal relationships.
He “disdain[s]” personal relationships.
[] Use square brackets to make minor grammatical or stylistic changes.
He feels “shielded in my armor”
He feels “shielded in [his] armor”
He is “safe within [the] womb“ of his apartment.
... ellipsis
He feels that he has “no need of friendship; friendship causes pain”.
He feels that “friendship... causes pain”, so he would prefer not to have friends.
He feels that “no need... causes pain”. NO GOOD, NOT GRAMMATICAL, DOESN’T CONVEY MEANING
[] ... powerful tools, wield them lightly
His “feelings... have died [,so he never wants to] cr[y]” again. A MESS
He doesn’t want to wake up his “feelings that have died”, so he prefers to be alone. NEATER, MORE ELEGANT
BALANCE between quoted material and readability.
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